I got a phone call this morning.
I answered it with my normal "Hello"
I heard a squeal and sharp intake of breath.
Then a wail.
"I fell down the two bottom stairs at my house, I just had
a DAVE moment"

Pause.

Some people have monuments built in their honour.
Some have their names on a marquis.
Some even get invited to tea with the Queen.

What do I get?
Bonehead moments in people's lives named after me.

Do I say "Thank you", or do I become insulted?
Too late to be insulted, I already splattered my own
personal Dave moments all over the web.

I could be with friends.
Minding my own business.
Eating my buffalo wings quietly whilst they all engage in
conversation around me. Someone drops a wing.
Instantly all eyes are on *ME* like it was MY fault or something.

They look back to the poor schmuck that sits there presently
wingless and remark... "Nice Dave stunt." Then continue
on with their conversation. While I sit there,
pointing to myself in exasperation, mouth open, blinking,
saying "Wha... "DAVE stunt????", pushing my chair
out to stand with indignation.

Of course, when I do this, the wing basket gets knocked over
with my elbow and we lose a couple more to the dust
bunnies on the floor.

They all just look at me and I hear the odd scattered comment
"Yeah, Dave stunt."

Actually it's flattering to have a "moment" named after you.
No matter what kind of moment it is. But it would be nice, for
example, that when all eyes are on a bride and a
groom during a beautiful and moving ceremony,
seeing the happy couple kiss for the first time married,
that everyone would think to themselves "*sigh* this is
beautiful, such a Dave moment".

Instead of when the groom drops the ring, bride and
groom both bend to retrieve it, bonk heads, falling down
unconscious... "yeah, now *that* is a Dave moment!"

But I'm not complaining.

Maybe someday *I'LL* have a monument built in my honour.
Besides the "Here lies Dave. She had a "Dave moment"
with a bus" one that I'm sure I'll eventually have.

Maybe someday *I'LL* have my name on a marquis.
"Dave's Excellent Adventure with a Bus"

And maybe the Queen will request my presence at the Palace.
I *did* get a letter asked what size hat I wear, they're
either going to give me a crown, or a jesters hat.
You figure it out.

Anyway, I guess what I'm trying to say, is it's ok.....
It's ok if you would rather shorten your sentence from...

"Honey, the most absurd thing happened to me today,
you really just won't believe it.....
...................... to.................................

"I had a Dave moment"

Go ahead, I don't mind.
*twitch*

Take me home! Main Dave's Chronicles