A day in Central Ontario
It's always an adventure going to Bala.
That's where I chose to go, with both demons.
I learned a great many things during my stay.
My sister Kibbie (if you ask, she will tell you that
Damian and Lucifer were on very good behaviour.
Big hugs for Damian.
He came over to me, wrapped his little 3 year old arms around
We sat amongst ourselves well into the evening, talking,
We played a little trivia. Naming the zigot process, specific
"If it took a flea with pants on two weeks to crawl through a barrel
(He's a member of the Mensa society, what can I say?)
We had signature forging contests. Loon did a very close
Coming up with the perfect sentence for each of us to write
We did tongue twisters.
"The sixth sick sheiks sixth sick sheep's sick"
We gave up.
Tim, the morning after the Toronto Maple Leafs were
"The Hawks beat them, because the Leaf's hearts just were not
I nodded grimly.
Tim sighs.
"Everyone's thoughts are in his prayers"
"Ah. So he just wishes we thought about him"
"Well it's the thought that counts."
Tim saunters off, amused. Though I think he was
At bedtime, I was secluded to the back room with
I woke at 3:30am, dreaming of being pelted with rocks,
I still wonder.
Have you ever played "The Sentence Game"?
There were four of us.
"What the heck is Bala?" you ask?
*THE* cranberry capital of Ontario!
Pretty impressive don't you think?
To visit my sister on Lake Muskoka for two days.
Right in the heart of cranberry country.
is her real name, just as "Dave" is mine), and her
husband Tim (real name Tyler), and their son Jack.
No, that actually *is* his real name.
After everyone said hello, it was Jack's turn to make
the rounds.
Big hugs for Lucifer.
my neck, kissed my cheek, and sneezed all over my head.
I felt very welcomed.
laughing, amusing ourselves with their friend "Loon", real
name unknown. This guy is hilarious, maybe a few pins
short of a strike, but hilarious. Scary sometimes.
During a lull in the conversation, he stared at the ceiling
mumbling... "I hear dead people's voices". *tremble*
bone names, how and why your joints work as they do...
however Tim really stumped us with this one:
of molassis in winter, how long would it take a one
armed midget to sandpaper an elephant down to the size of
a bulldog?"
resemblence to Frank Sinatra. While Kibbie pulled off a
fairly decent Bobby Orr. Which led to "Who prints and who
writes the neatest"?
didn't take long. Each and every one of us printed, then wrote
"You are totally screwed".
Kibbie won.
Loon lost with
"You are tottally screwed", spelling mistake demerit. Duh.
Excelling at most.
But Loon came up
with one that we couldn't even say once in a less
than sober frame of mind.
crushed by Chicago 5-2 (Tim is an extreme Leafs fan)
was discussing rather passionately with me, the injury
suffered by team player Bryan Berard.
in the game, everyone was thinking about Berard."
laughing at me, since I'm not an enthusiastic hockey
buff. I prefer baseball, what can I say?
the demons. Damian quickly chose the cot, not having
to share with anyone. So Lucifer and I got to share
the double bed. Which is usually fine. But it's been a long
time since Lucifer slept all night in *my* bed.
as my eyes opened, Lucifer hoofed me a good one with his
foot right between the eyes. He ended up lying upsidedown
in the bed, feet on the pillow, head dangling over the edge of
the bed, having puppy dreams. And I was getting hoofed
unconscious. Damian was down there in the cot, talking in
his sleep. I gave up, grabbed a flashlight and started reading
a "People Magazine" about real people with "Sixth Senses".
Eventually had a nightmare that Kibbie and Tim weren't real.
A number of people sit around the table with a blank
piece of paper and a pen. They make up a sentence,
any sentence, unfinished at the end. Fold the paper down
over their unfinished sentence and hands it to the person
next to them telling them only the last word. The next person
(without knowing anything about what was previously
written) starts THEIR sentence off with the last word of the
first person.
One of ours went something like this, beginning with Kibbie:
cooly, "If you want some of this, come get it!" Do you think
like a Rastafarian in a speedboat drinking grapejuice from
where we do not know? I can tell you, we all enjoyed it!"
Get the picture? We did this about 10 times, each letter getting
stranger, funnier and more off the wall. It's a
*GREAT* game to play with alot of really wacko people.
and out the window, in and out the window, they all went
very quickly between her heaving breasts, it was terrible
as the mission spiraled perilously into a wombat's ear
Ok maybe you have to BE there. But it WAS funny!
After all the lessons I learned, I realized I would return home
Perhaps some things just have to stay in Bala.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~copyright 2000 ~ Dave~~~~~~~~~~~
a changed woman. Ever the smarter. Ever enlightened.
Fact is, when I returned home, nobody understood the
sentence game, didn't appreciate the fake signatures, OR
the "you are totally screwed" idea.
The cranberry capital of Ontario.
Where they really have nothing better to do I guess.
*sigh*
I can't wait to go back.
Take me home!
Main Dave's Chronicles